Tag Archives: growing up

Young Girl Advice

If you had the opportunity to have dinner with someone from your past, who would you choose? 

You’ve probably heard this question before, maybe choosing someone in your life who’s passed on.  Someone you miss and just want to talk to them again, hear their voice.  See their face one more time.  Smell their perfume.  Touch their skin.

Me?  I want to have dinner with my 20-year-old self.  She’s definitely someone from my past.  She had the world by the balls and she was having the time of her life.  I want to talk to that girl.  I want to get inside her head and try to figure out what she was thinking.  What she was feeling or not feeling.  Why she did certain things and said certain things.  Why she dressed the way she did.  I want to crawl inside that body and just take a look at the world through her eyes.  What was important to her?  What wasn’t?

I hear from other mom’s with kids around the age I was when I got married…how they are kind of self-centered and their focus isn’t necessarily on anything important.  I can sympathize with that person.  I was snooty and arrogant and thought I knew everything.  I made lots of mistakes.  I took things for granted.  I never thought I’d be fat.  I never worried about wrinkling up like a prune.  I took my health for granted.  I didn’t make certain people a priority. I took relationships for granted and now when I look back, I should have spent more time being and doing instead of making excuses.

What would happen if we could take our knowledge about life right now, and put it into the 20-year-old we used to be?  How would we have been different?  I want the 20 year old Robin to walk a mile in the 51-year-old Robin’s shoes.  How funny is that?  She’s gonna have a tough time walking with my gimp feet, that’s for sure.   I would tell her to “suck it up cupcake”.  I want her to see what her life looks like now.  I want her to see how the choices she’s made early on have molded the life that she has and the person that she has become today.

If I told 20-year-old Robin about her life as a 50 something year old, I know she would be mortified, but she probably wouldn’t believe me, because that’s just how 20-year-old know-it-alls are.  She would take one look at me and think, “that couldn’t possibly be me, that’s not my true story”.  I don’t think I’m a complete failure by any means, but as I look back on my life, I would have probably done a few things differently.  I would have gone in other directions.  I would have taken bigger chances.  I can say that now because of the person I AM now.  But the person I was “then” didn’t.  Wouldn’t.

I would tell young Robin to stop being so stuck up.  Quit taking yourself so seriously.  Appreciate your body type, enjoy it while you have it and quit worrying about sucking in your stomach.  Don’t hide behind your makeup, you’re pretty enough without less.  Let your hair get wet and don’t let anybody tell you aren’t good enough.  Dress the way YOU want to dress, funky wardrobe and all.  Put the windows down in the car and let the wind toss that mop all over your head, and laugh at yourself.   Don’t compare yourself to other people, you don’t know what their lives are really like.  Be a better mother, it’s one of the most important roles you’ll ever play.    Pay attention. Don’t stop learning.  Don’t be so mean, learn to control your anger.  Make more friends, don’t judge a book by its cover.  Quit making excuses, that will NEVER get you anywhere.  Try as hard as you can to put yourself in somebody else’s shoes before you judge them. Choose being kind over being right.  That’s a big one.  I still struggle with that on a daily basis.   Enjoy what God has given you, and be thankful.

Every.  Single.  Day.

I struggled to find a good song for this topic, but then I found this and thought, “perfect”!

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Being a Mom

There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think about being a mom.  I must admit that I didn’t take it as seriously as I do now.  (Sorry Shawn) Early in my “motherhood”, I was trying to learn this new responsibility and everything that THAT included.  I’m not going to go into the things that I could “no longer” do.  That’s not what this blog post is about.  I want to write about the actual act of being a mom.

Being the ripe ole age of 50, I’m lucky enough to get the opportunity to look back on my life as a mom and see where I went wrong and what I did right.  Now that’s obviously my interpretation, and if you talk to my kids, they might have a different take on it, and that’s fine.
Interpretation does take on many faces.  This face is mine…

Image

I’m sorry, I think that picture is hilarious, as are some of my “mom” moments.

I think it’s difficult to actually “feel” like a mom until you’re able to enjoy the fruits of your labor. I get to see that in two of my three fruits.  Ha ha.  Couldn’t pass that one up either…

When your kids reach a certain age, and believe me, that age is different for each child, they start making you feel proud about the way they’ve turned out.  It’s like a work project that started so many years ago, you barely remember when it first began, but you’re finally getting to see it come to fruition.

I don’t necessarily gauge my children’s adult worth on any certain life event or lack of event.  I measure it on the kind of person they’ve turned out to be.  How they’ve chosen to live their life and how they treat others and themselves.

I’m pretty damn proud.  I get to sit back and watch the direction they’re taking their lives and see their hopes and dreams become reality.  That makes me very proud.  I like to say I live vicariously through my children.  I didn’t have the gumption to do a lot of things that it turns out I’m pretty sorry for at this time in my life, but I’m so glad that my kids are taking chances and seeing a future filled with opportunity and hope.  I get to hear about plans for the future and nothing makes me more proud of being a mom than that.

My little fruit is well on his way to being a good person, but he still has a long way to go.  I don’t know how long it will take, but I’m confident that he will become just as awesome as the other two are.

My work is far from done, but I’m happy just being a mom.